Is Marriage Therapy Helpful? A Biblical Perspective on Healing and Growth

Marriage is one of the most sacred commitments two people can make. As Christians, we believe that marriage is a covenant ordained by God—a relationship meant to reflect Christ’s unconditional love for us His church. But even when two people love Jesus, marriage struggles are inevitable. No relationship is immune to the pressures and influences of stress, parenting, financial concerns, and really, life in general.  

Christian marriage counseling is a gift given to us on this side of eternity to help us walk this path of marriage that requires selflessness, patience, and sometimes painful insight into ourselves. This tool of couples counseling isn’t just for healing trauma that may have occurred inside, or outside of, the relationship. It can also promote a deeper bond, greater intimacy, and an overall increase in regard for your spouse.  

Here at Dwell, we emphasize a holistic view of mental health—caring for mind, body, soul, and relationships.  These do not exist in separate buckets but rather are intertwined like a Venn Diagram.  Marriage therapy helps to unite the couple and provides tools to help them not only thrive in their relationship but also glorify God through it.

This article outlines why marriage therapy can be helpful for every couple, how it aligns with Biblical principles, and how it can promote a stronger relationship with Christ at the center.  

What Is Marriage Therapy?

Marriage therapy, or faith-based couples counseling, is a form of therapy that helps spouses:

• Resolve conflict

• Improve communication

• Increase understanding

• Restore trust

• Reconnect emotionally, spiritually, and physically

• Deepen friendship and love for one another

At Dwell, we typically utilize a blend of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Gottman Method Therapy—two research-backed approaches that support emotional bonding and relationship skills. Each modality (a therapeutic type or philosophy) brings different skills and perspectives to the table and assists couples differently. Blending different modalities based on the needs of the couple can create a unique path forward in your relationship that caters to your personalities, needs, and challenges. For more on how we approach marriage therapy here at Dwell, check out our relationship therapy page. 

Marriage therapy isn’t just about communicating better or decreasing the amount of conflict. On the contrary, we often say conflict is not the enemy!  Rather conflict is an opportunity to deepen intimacy and create purpose in your marriage.  This purpose guides us in our love for each other, rising above conflict, giving the benefit of the doubt, and working together as a team.  Marriage therapy gives couples a roadmap to walk hand in hand together—working collaboratively to navigate life’s challenges.  

Common Reasons Christian Couples Seek Therapy

Even Christian couples face real-life struggles. Seeking help through Christian marriage therapy is not a sign of spiritual weakness—it’s an act of wisdom and humility. It’s recognition that two beautiful but broken image bearers will have trouble navigating the complexities of human relationships and the sacred covenant of marriage. 

Here are some reasons why couples turn to therapy:

• Communication issues–feeling unheard, misunderstood, or stuck in conflict

• Emotional or spiritual disconnection—feeling unseen or unappreciated, or “out of sync”

• Betrayal or broken trust—including infidelity or other relational wounds

• Sexual intimacy challenges—differing expectations, hurtful communication, or feelings of inadequacy

• Parenting disagreements—clashes over styles, values, and/or expectations

• Grief, stress, or major life changes—different circumstances shift our worldviews, our needs, and our capacities 

• Unresolved past trauma—trauma informs the way we respond to conflict, our ability to feel safe, and our willingness to be vulnerable 

A marriage therapist’s role is not to be a referee or to figure out who is right. The therapy room is not a place for airing your dirty laundry or even solving problems. Effective Christian marriage therapy provides tools to repair relationships and navigate challenging issues and a path forward even in the midst of difficulties. It’s about creating space for grace, empathy, and reconciliation—the way God intended.

How Marriage Therapy Aligns with Christian Values

 1. Restoration and Reconciliation

Therapy offers a space to pursue reconciliation, not just resolution. It reflects the heart of God—who specializes in restoring what is broken. Marriage therapy serves as a tool for reconciliation and restoration by helping couples address conflict and relational wounds with grace, humility, and truth. Rooted in principles such as commitment (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:6), forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32), fidelity (Hebrews 13:4), selfless love (1 Corinthians 13), sanctification (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10),  and peacemaking (Matthew 5:9), therapy creates a space where spouses can reflect, repent, and rebuild trust through vulnerable communication. With the help of a trained counselor, couples are encouraged to communicate openly, seek healing, and realign their relationship with God’s design for marriage—a covenant marked by unity, selfless love, sacrifice, and enduring commitment.

 2. Learning to Love Like Christ

Marriage therapy helps couples learn to love each other as Jesus loves us—unconditionally, sacrificially, and graciously. By addressing wounds, misunderstandings, and patterns of selfishness, therapy guides spouses toward a deeper understanding of Christ-like love (John 13:34). It encourages humility, forgiveness, empathy, and patience, reflecting the way Jesus meets us with compassion and truth. As couples grow in emotional and spiritual maturity, they are better equipped to serve one another, bear each other’s burdens, and build a marriage that mirrors the generous, redemptive love of Jesus.

In therapy, couples learn to:

• Seek to understand first

• Listen with patience

• Communicate with gentleness

• Forgive without conditions

• Serve one another selflessly

These are all reflections of Christ’s love.

3. Developing Humility and Grace

Christian marriage therapy fosters humility and grace in a culture that often promotes self-interest and personal fulfillment as the highest goals in marriage. Instead of encouraging spouses to demand their own way, therapy here at Dwell invites them to listen, empathize, and take responsibility for their actions—reflecting the biblical call to consider others above ourselves (Philippians 2:3-4). Through guided conversations and intentional reflection, couples learn to feel and express empathy, lay down pride, extend grace in moments of failure, and prioritize unity over individualism. In doing so, christian marriage therapy helps reshape marriages to reflect God’s design—marked by mutual submission, sacrificial love, and a spirit of servant-hearted partnership.

How to Choose a Christian Marriage Therapist

Choosing a quality Christian marriage therapist begins with finding someone who holds both professional credentials and a strong foundation in biblical truth. We recommend looking for these things when looking for a good fit therapist:

• Professional credentials – licensed in the state you live in and experience with marriage and family therapy

• Faith integration – actively incorporates Christian principles into their practice

• Biblical worldview – honors marriage as a covenant before God

• Safe and respectful space – both spouses should feel valued and heard

• Practical skills – equipped with tools for communication, conflict resolution, and emotional growth

Helpful Questions to Ask Before Beginning Therapy:

1. What is your background in marriage and family therapy?
   

2. Do you have specific training or experience working with Christian couples?
   

3. How do you integrate faith and psychology in your approach?
   

4. What is your stance on the role of Scripture in the counseling process?

5. Are you licensed and what credentials do you hold?
   

6. How do you approach biblical roles in marriage?
   

7. Do you use any specific counseling models (e.g., Emotionally Focused Therapy, Gottman method, etc.) and how does this fit with a Biblical worldview?
   

8. What is your view on the purpose of marriage from a biblical perspective?
   

9. Do you encourage the involvement of a couple’s church or pastoral leadership as part of the healing or growth process?
   

10. What does it look like for you to point couples back to the Gospel while also addressing practical relationship challenges?
    

Recommendations from trusted pastors, Christian friends, or church networks can be invaluable in finding someone trustworthy. Ultimately, pray for discernment in the process, asking God to lead you to a counselor who will speak truth in love and help your marriage grow in Christlikeness.

Need help finding someone local in North Carolina?  

Dwell has an incredible team of Christian therapists trained in specific specialties as well as faith integration, but we also have connections to other therapists beyond our own team.  We would be honored to help you find the right fit for your relationship.  

Final Thoughts: Marriage Therapy Is a Gift of Grace

Christian couples counseling is not a last resort—it’s a wise step toward growth, healing, and deeper intimacy. With Christ at the center, therapy becomes a sacred space for transformation, reconnection, and restoration. Whether you’re navigating conflict or simply want to strengthen your foundation, Christian marriage therapy offers tools, strategies, and support to help your relationship thrive.

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” – Ecclesiastes 4:12

Author: Lauren Bowman, LCMHC, Co-founder of Dwell

Further Resources:

Building a Strong Marriage: 5 Ways to Nurture Friendship and Intimacy

5 Ways to Deepen Your Connection: Selfless Love in a Selfish World